Parshat Nitzavim-Vayeilech – September 8, 2023 / 23 Elul, 5783
In a Talmudic parable, the sages tell us of a time when the great Rabbi Akiva was traveling along the road with some companions and approached a town where he decided that he would seek lodging for the night. Not a place or person in the town would give Rabbi Akiva a place to rest his head for the evening, to which he replied to his companions: “Whatever the Holy One does, it is for good.” Rabbi Akiva went on his way to spend the night in an open field with a rooster, a donkey, and a candle as his only possessions. In the night, a gust of wind came, and extinguished the candle. Soon after that, a cat approached and ate the rooster. Finally, a lion came upon Rabbi Akiva’s donkey, and devoured the animal. Still, Rabbi Akiva told his companions: “Whatever the Holy One does, it is for good.” Rabbi Akiva was now alone with his companions. That night, an army came into the city that had denied him lodging, and took the entirety of its population into captivity. Rabbi Akiva had no candle to give away his location, and no noisy donkey or rooster to make a sound that could be heard by the soldiers. Rabbi Akiva turned to his companions and said, “Didn’t I tell you, ‘whatever the Holy One does, it is for good’? (B. Ber 60b-61a). Do we not end up where we are supposed to be? Sometimes the negative can just seem negative.Perhaps we are just not at the conclusion of the chapter yet? Does Akiva have a point here?
There is no denying that change can be scary. We are at a time of the year when so many are experiencing changes. Our students are returning to school, our educators are returning to school. The air is getting crisper in the evening, which for me is always a symbol of the coming of the Yamim Noraim (the days of Awe) and our High Holy Days. If we are looking to our Torah portion for some reprieve from change, we might be disappointed.
In parsha Vayeilech (Moses went and spoke), Moses is 120 years old, and Rashi tells us this is the last day of his life. Moses, whom we have relied upon throughout so much traversing, and through so much struggle, triumph, and change…Moses will be leaving the earth, and new leadership will take over. Joshua will lead the people over the Jordan, and into a brand new land.
When I was reading this week’s double portion, I could not help but think about leaving for college after I had graduated high school. I was 17, and I was expected to gather up some things, get in the car, and move from small town upstate New York to the high-powered Boston Conservatory of Music in Boston Massachusetts. I remember having this deep pit in my stomach during the whole car ride there. This change was huge. I wondered what in the world I was doing there. I felt alone and unprepared, not so much for the work and training itself, but just for the whole experience. At 17 years-old, everything I knew changed. I entered a strange land, with different people, and different expectations. Eventually, I left, bounced around, and I searched for quite a while. The path was not linear, and nothing at all happened overnight.
This uncertainty, this fear even–I wonder if the Israelites felt the same. Moses relays a simple message from God to the people this week: “Be strong and courageous, do not be afraid…God–it is God who goes before you, and will not release you nor forsake you.” God goes on to tell the people that they WILL stray from the path, but they will be welcomed back.
Do we no need to hear these comforting words during times of uncertainty? It is OK to veer off the path. Nothing bad will happen if you do. You are not stuck. Everything might feel overwhelming. Moses is about to leave, school is just beginning. It can seem like so much to handle. We must refresh and take care of ourselves. Remind ourselves that setbacks are not always setbacks, just re-routes. Luckily our High Holy Days come around this time of year. They give us the chance to RETURN again and again, year after year. As the leaves begin to change, the holidays return again to us. Giving us a sense of stability and familiarity in a world that can feel anything but.
If we look to our text, can we feel as if God goes with us and before us. Can we take some of that fear of change, and transform it into compassionate curiosity and excitement. Sometimes when we lose something, be it familiarity, or a candle a rooster and a donkey in the desert like Rabbi Akiva, it can be hard to see what it is all for. Can we revel in the mystery while on the way?
May we all be blessed to tackle change knowing that we have one another. We have here together, and isn’t that alone a blessing?
Shabbat Shalom.
– Rabbi Josh Gray